These Are The Funniest Things That Were Ever Said In A Court. -

These Are The Funniest Things That Were Ever Said In A Court.


What comes to your mind when you hear the word “court“? Justice? Boring? Serious? But what if I tell you that courtrooms can be funny too? These funniest moments of serious courtroom sessions will prove it for you.

Also read: 
25 Weird Things Most Girls Secretly Do When They’re Alone And Naked! 

1. This Witness Sure Knows The Funniest Way To Answer In A Court

Funniest court

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Lawyer
: Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing?

Witness: Yes.

Lawyer: Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car?

Witness: Yes, sir.

Lawyer: What did she say?

Witness: ‘What disco am I at?’

2. This Lawyer Made Everyone’s Day By Being The Funniest Idiot In Court. 

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Lawyer
: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

Witness: No.

Lawyer: Did you check for blood pressure?

Witness: No.

Lawyer: Did you check for breathing?

Witness: No…

Lawyer: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?

Witness: No.

Lawyer: How can you be so sure, Doctor?

Witness: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

Lawyer: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?

Witness: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

3. Sometimes The Funniest People  Can’t Help Being Bad At Math. 

Funniest courtvia 

 Lawyer: How old is your son, the one living with you?

Witness: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which.

Lawyer: How long has he lived with you?

Witness: Forty-five years.

4. This Witness In Court Is Being A Smart-Ass. 

Funniest courtvia


Lawyer
:, What is your date of birth?

Witness: July 18th.

Lawyer: What year?

Witness: Every year.

5. The Funniest Way To Insult A Lawyer While The Court Is In Session 

Funniest court

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Lawyer
: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?

Witness: He’s 20, much like your IQ.

6. This Court Scene Really Shows How Not To Ask Stupid Questions

Funniest courtvia

Lawyer :She had three children, right?

Defendant : Yes.

Lawyer: How many were boys?

Defendant: None.

Lawyer: Were there any girls?

Defendant : Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new lawyer? 

7. Is This Lawyer Trying To Win The Award For Being The Funniest Of Them All? 

Funniest courtvia


Lawyer
: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?

Witness: Yes.

Lawyer: And in what ways does it affect your memory?

Witness: I forget..

Lawyer: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot? 

8. Sessions In Court Can Be Quite The Funny. 

Funniest courtvia


Lawyer
: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?

Witness: Oral…

9. He Couldn’t Resist The Pun In Court

Funniest courtvia


Lawyer
: Doctor, did you say he was shot in the woods?

Witness: No, I said he was shot in the lumbar region.

10. Court Session Here Proves Honesty Can Be The Funniest Policy 

Funniest courtvia


Lawyer
: Now sir, I’m sure you are an intelligent and honest man–

Witness: Thank you. If I weren’t under oath, I’d return the compliment.

11. Another Lawyer Being An Idiot In Court 

Funniest courtvia


Lawyer
: How was your first marriage terminated?

Witness: By death…

Lawyer : And by whose death was it terminated?

Witness: Take a guess.

12. This Witness In Court Proved The Point That This Lawyer Needs To Get His Act Together

Funniest courtvia


Lawyer
: Any suggestions as to what prevented this from being a murder trial instead of an attempted murder trial?

Witness: The victim lived.


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